Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Here's to the New Year
Monday, December 29, 2008
Down in the Dumps
Several tags throughout this entry ... snag only please.
I just haven't been me lately. I don't know what's wrong with me. I couldn't wait for Christmas to be over with so all the decorations could come down & be stored away for next year. This is highly unusual for me. Usually the decorations are up before Thanksgiving (not this year) and I have never taken them down until New Years day. (They were all put away the day after Christmas). I don't know what was going on with me ... I just wanted it all out of my site.
Granny is gone but I know I'm not sad because of that ... she's no longer in pain. I sent a basket full of daisies. I couldn't decide what I wanted to send and the only thing I could think of was that she was gone & gonna be pushing up daisies ... so daisies it was.
My brother (twins dad) isn't talking to me now. =( He came over a few days ago saying that he was leaving his wife cause he couldn't take her crap anymore. He was trying to get us to say he could stay with us without actually asking us but we let him know he needed to be a man ... go home & work out his problems with his wife. He's got a family to think about now & running out on them isn't an option he should take. Sunday morning 12:20 am ... I'm dead asleep when the phone rings ... brother calling me crying uncontrollably asking for a place to stay. I knew from a previous phone call that he was drunk and had done a few lines of coke. Sorry ... I don't need that mess on my door step. Hubby took the phone from me & told him he couldn't stay here. He hung up!
Dad called me yesterday morning to let me know the funeral went well ... the preacher was very long winded but the service was beautiful & they could all tell she was well loved by the amount of people that showed up to leave respect for her. Anyway, dad & brother came back home yesterday ... but not to an empty house. My other brother (twins dad) had got into a bit of trouble & crashed at their house. So here is what really happened ...
Saturday night hubby & I were sitting around watching our favorite movies when the phone rings ... it's my SIL, she's not crying but you can tell in her voice that she's about to hurt someone. She tells us to be on the look out for my brother cause he's just left her house drunker than drunk & higher than a kite. Before he left the house he smashed into her car so she was letting us know that she was calling the cops on him. I called her back about an house later to check on her ... she's my SIL and I care a lot about her. She went into more details. He tried to smack her around but she's a BIG lady so she ended up throwing him into a fence and that's when he took off. He called her lots of names but the one that broke my heart is ... she said right in front of their kids he called her a F'n N*g*r. Now, I don't know about you but around here that word just isn't used cause it's a very derogatory word that no person should ever be called. It's even worse that he felt it necessary to call his wife this nasty name & even worse then that ... his kids are half black so what must he think of his own children? SIL told us this was unforgivable & something that he as a father can never take back. She said the twins are to young to know what was said or really to know what it means but her daughter heard the words clear as day & was devastated that her step dad would say such a thing. I think of Quanasia as my niece so it broke my heart to know that my brother caused her this pain. We went to see niece & SIL yesterday and the niece didn't really want to talk ... don't know if it was from lack of sleep the night before or the fact that she believes I may feel the same way as my brother.
So ... I decided I would call SIL so I could go over, see the twins & check in on her. A man answered the phone ... I asked for SIL and then I heard an angry voice that I immediately recognized ... my brother. He very rudely says call the house to talk to her then hangs up on me. What a flipping poonanny!
Now I'm at SIL's house ... Part of me seemed to need proof that my brother was actually as horrible as she had said the night before. I know my brother is a very troubled man but when all is said & done ... he's still my brother & I love him for this fact. Well, he did indeed crash into her car. There was a bad place on her front wheel well & then one on the back of her car. Now ... my baby brother wanted to defend the other brother with are you sure he wrecked her car? Ya know he doesn't have any crash marks on his truck. All I can say is I know what I saw and I know that just because you hit someone doesn't mean that both cars will show proof.
Oh ... as if all this drama isn't bad enough I took the advice of many of my readers & have tried to contact the lady who has my little Harley. She isn't answering any of my e-mails. I'm just heart broken. I'm beginning to wonder if I was scammed out of a dog so she could sell him for money. Ya see, she put in a request for a small dog through the local free cycle ... since Christmas she has popped up asking for tons of things. Computers .... beds ... treadmill ... scrap booking supplies ... you name it. Now how is it that she can ask for these items but not answer a simple e-mail of how is Harley doing? I have her phone number so I think I'm gonna be calling later today instead of sending e-mails. IMO ... you shouldn't say call anytime to check on him if you don't really mean it. Am I crazy for thinking this way?
Ok ... I'm outta here for right now. Hubby is on 3rd shift so looks like we'll be out of the house most of the day. Who knows what we'll be doing but I know we won't be here. Have a great day!
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Goodbye granny
Merry Christmas to all of you. I don't think I'll be on line tomorrow to wish you all a happy joyous day.
So ... this week I took daughter to the bone specialist ... she does have a hair line crack in her elbow still but she no longer needs the sling. He believes that if she is just careful with her activity for the next few weeks she will continue to heal. She doesn't have any pain at all so that's good news.
My brother came over yesterday ... weird cause he doesn't visit much. Anyway, he came over for marital advice. He & his wife are having problems again. He was contemplating leaving her but didn't want to leave his boys behind. Hubby & I talked him into going home & talking it through with his wife. He's a grown man & needs to be grown up ... there's no more walking away when things don't go your way. Besides ... it's Christmas ... no one needs that on the brain at this time of the year. I haven't heard from him but I'm hoping that all goes well. I'd like to see the twins but I sure don't won't to drop in during their problems.
Hubby's tooth has been hurting him lately but he's the typical guy ... won't do anything about it until the pain is so great that he can't stand to do anything. Well, I told him to call the dentist & hope that they could get him in. I knew it was a long shot with it being Christmas eve but ... he called ... they don't open until Monday morning. Hate that he's in pain but darn it ... that's what he gets for waiting until the pain is almost unbearable. Ya know?
Anyway, when he got ready to call the doctors he used my phone because I had the number already programed in ... he noticed that my dad had made a call about 12 after midnight. As soon as I heard that I knew what the call was all about. My granny had passed away. So I called dad & sure enough ... she's gone. She passed away at about 10 after 12 this morning. We were all hoping she would make it passed Christmas so we wouldn't have to think about her death at this time but she just couldn't hold out any longer. All her kids are together planning for the funeral ... sounds like their going to do it this Saturday. We're not going!
I told dad we couldn't go because hubby had to work but it was not the truth. I'm not going cause when it all boils down to the nitty gritty ... she's not my blood grandmother. I love my dad & most of his family but in the end I know that he is my step dad & none of those people are my blood. I wasn't very close to my granny either. She was a crass old woman who I always felt took great pleasure in putting me down. The only time I felt she approved of me is when I got married right out of high school ... I was very small & for my granny if you weren't physically fit then you were just a slob who would never amount to anything. Isn't that sad? I know that's just the way she was but it always hurt! Of course she was never this way with her blood grandchildren only those of us who had married in to the family. My step sister is much heavier than me but she was the light of grannies eye ... doesn't matter that she was big into drugs and alcohol when she was younger ... doesn't matter that she a baby when she had her baby ... I've lived the straight & narrow life for the most part but never got her approval. So why should I go to the funeral?
With all of this said I would like to say goodbye to granny. I loved her because she is my (step) dad's mother but I didn't like her very much. May she rest in peace and have no more pain. May the family's heart heal and remember the loving side.
Oh ... we had another death in our family Monday night ... my granny's sisters SIL hung himself. No one really knows why he took his life but yup ... 2 family members in less than a week.
My dad has been more a part of my life then my own mother so it's for that reason that I don't call him step dad very often.
Santa and Sarah
"Your friend? Your sister?'" "Yes, Santa,' he replied. "My sister, Sarah, who is very sick," he said sadly.
Santa glanced over at the grandmother who was waiting nearby, and saw her dabbing her eyes with a tissue. "She wanted to come with me to see you, oh, so very much, Santa!" the child exclaimed. "She misses you," he added softly.
Santa tried to be cheerful and encouraged a smile to the boy's face, asking him what he wanted Santa to bring him for Christmas.
When they finished their visit, the Grandmother came over to help the child off his lap, and started to say something to Santa, but halted.
"What is it?" Santa asked warmly.
"Well, I know it's really too much to ask you, Santa, but ..." the old woman began, shooing her grandson over to one of Santa's elves to collect the little gift which Santa gave all his young visitors. "The girl in the photograph... my granddaughter well, you see ... she has leukemia and isn't expected to make it even through the holidays," she said through tear-filled eyes.
"Is there any way, Santa . any possible way that you could come see Sarah? That's all she's asked for, for Christmas, is to see Santa."
Santa blinked and swallowed hard and told the woman to leave information with his elves as to where Sarah was, and he would see what he could do. Santa thought of little else the rest of that afternoon.
He knew what he had to do.
"What if it were MY child lying in that hospital bed, dying," he thought with a sinking heart, "This is the least I can do."
When Santa finished visiting with all the boys and girls that evening, he retrieved from his helper the name of the hospital where Sarah was staying. He asked the assistant location manager how to get to Children's Hospital.
"Why?" Rick asked, with a puzzled look on his face.
Santa relayed to him the conversation with Sarah's grandmother earlier that day. "C'mon.....I'll take you there." Rick said softly. Rick drove them to the hospital and came inside with Santa. They found out which room Sarah was in. A pale Rick said he would wait out in the hall.
Santa quietly peeked into the room through the half-closed door and saw little Sarah on the bed.
The room was full of what appeared to be her family; there was the Grandmother and the girl's brother he had met earlier that day. A woman whom he guessed was Sarah's mother stood by the bed, gently pushing Sarah's thin hair off her forehead.
And another woman who he discovered later was Sarah's aunt, sat in a chair near the bed with a weary, sad look on her face. They were talking quietly, and Santa could sense the warmth and closeness of the family, and their love and concern for Sarah.
Taking a deep breath, and forcing a smile on his face, Santa entered the room, bellowing a hearty, "Ho, ho, ho!" "Santa!" shrieked little Sarah weakly, as she tried to escape her bed to run to him, IV tubes intact.
Santa rushed to her side and gave her a warm hug. A child the tender age of his own son -- 9 years old -- gazed up at him with wonder and excitement.
Her skin was pale and her short tresses bore telltale bald patches from the effects of chemotherapy. But all he saw when he looked at her was a pair of huge, blue eyes. His heart melted, and he had to force himself to choke back tears.
Though his eyes were riveted upon Sarah's face, he could hear the gasps and quiet sobbing of the women in the room.
As he and Sarah began talking, the family crept quietly to the bedside one by one, squeezing Santa's shoulder or his hand gratefully, whispering "Thank you" as they gazed sincerely at him with shining eyes.
Santa and Sarah talked and talked, and she told him excitedly all the toys she wanted for Christmas, assuring him she'd been a very good girl that year.
As their time together dwindled, Santa felt led in his spirit to pray for Sarah, and asked for permission from the girl's mother. She nodded in agreement and the entire family circled around Sarah's bed, holding hands.
Santa looked intensely at Sarah and asked her if she believed in angels. "Oh, yes, Santa..... I do!" she exclaimed.
"Well, I'm going to ask that angels watch over you." he said. Laying one hand on the child's head, Santa closed his eyes and prayed. He asked that God touch little Sarah, and heal her body from this disease.
He asked that angels minister to her, watch and keep her. And when he finished praying, still with eyes closed, he started singing, softly, "Silent Night, Holy Night.... all is calm, all is bright..."
"The family joined in, still holding hands, smiling at Sarah, and crying tears of hope, tears of joy for this moment, as Sarah beamed at them all.
When the song ended, Santa sat on the side of the bed again and held Sarah's frail, small hands in his own. "Now, Sarah," he said authoritatively, "you have a job to do, and that is to concentrate on getting well. I want you to have fun playing with your friends this summer, and I expect to see you at my house at Mayfair Mall this time next year!"
He knew it was risky proclaiming that to this little girl who had terminal cancer,
but he "had" to. He had to give her the greatest gift he could -- not dolls or games or toys -- but the gift of HOPE.
"Yes, Santa!" Sarah exclaimed, her eyes bright. He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead and left the room.
Out in the hall, the minute Santa's eyes met Rick's, a look passed between them and they wept unashamed.
Sarah's mother and grandmother slipped out of the room quickly and rushed to
Santa's side to thank him.
"My only child is the same age as Sarah," he explained quietly. "This is the least I could do." They nodded with understanding and hugged him.
One year later, Santa Mark was again back on the set in Milwaukee for his six-week,
seasonal job which he so loves to do. Several weeks went by and then one day a child
came up to sit on his lap."Hi, Santa! Remember me?!" "Of course, I do," Santa proclaimed (as he always does), smiling down at her. After all, the secret to being a "good" Santa is to always make each child feel as if they are the "only" child in the world at that moment.
"You came to see me in the hospital last year!" Santa's jaw dropped. Tears immediately sprang in his eyes, and he grabbed this> little miracle and held her to his chest. "Sarah!" he exclaimed.
He scarcely recognized her, for her hair was long and silky and her cheeks were rosy -- much different from the little girl he had visited just a year before. He looked over and saw Sarah's mother and grandmother in the sidelines smiling and waving and wiping their eyes.
That was the best Christmas ever for Santa Claus.He had witnessed --and been blessed to be instrumental in bringing about -- this miracle of hope.
This precious little child was healed. Cancer-free. Alive and well. He silently looked up to Heaven and humbly whispered, "Thank you, Father. 'Tis a very, Merry Christmas!"
If you believe in miracles you will pass this on...I did!
God will never bring you to a place he cannot bring you through.
Live Simply, Love Generously, Care Deeply.
Speak Kindly and Leave the Rest to God
Follow your heartfelt, God-given dreams NEVER settle for status quo!
Monday, December 22, 2008
Catching Up
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
MIA for a few
Friday, December 5, 2008
Sad Day
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Snag & Doggie update
Snag only Please!
Christmas is almost here. I love this time of the year. I don't know why! I always spend way to much money on things that no one really needs, shoot ... sometimes I'm sure they don't even want what I purchased but at least they smile & say thanks. Maybe I love this time of year because everyone seems to be more friendly ... the south is known for it's southern hospitality & let me tell ya there are some really nice people around here. However ... when Christmas rolls around people are even nicer. Sometimes it's annoying but mostly it's wonderful. I love all the lights and lawn ornaments ... still have to get hubby to put ours up. We're running so behind on the outside of the house. I know it's because last weekend we were cooking/shopping and this week even though he is on second shift he's pulling double shifts. It's such a hard way to go ... not even necessary but ahhh ... the extra money is nice.
On the job front ... hubby reports to his new job on the 21st of this month. It's a Sunday but they told him it's just a computer thing. He comes in & says I'm here & then he comes back home. He will actually do a full day on the 22nd. I'm guessing there won't be any classes in session with it being so close to Christmas but he will still have to go in & get his office & class room situated the way he wants it. It's strange, he'll have an office again. It's been about 8 months since he's had one. The air field is just a bunch of shared space.
UPDATE on the love shack doggies
Okie ... so I called the vet. Got through after about a million tries. We use the military vet cause it's a lot less expensive then all the surrounding ones. Anyway, they say it's normal for them to mate over & over again. The male is just trying to make for sure it takes ... if it doesn't then he truly is the worthless piece of chit that hubby says he is. =} Anyway, the vet said the male will continue trying until she is either no longer in heat or until she no longer wishes for him to be around her. Hmmm, that that sounds like the little witch that I know of. She never wants him to touch her ... she barely lets any of us love on her anymore. She's just a moody biotch!
That's all for me. Gotta go make breakfast & get the kids started on their school. I think it's gonna be one of those days where they don't want to do anything. I sure hope not though ... with hubby working a double ... I'm gonna be a moody mama if they give me any trouble. Have a great afternoon. Hugs